Behold the new BMW 1 Series- Front Wheel Drive, with the Nose of a Cocaine Addict

Kinja'd!!! "Jordan" (jordanbelljb)
05/27/2019 at 07:35 • Filed to: None

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This is the new, 3rd generation BMW 1 Series. Unlike previous versions, its FWD, and shares its platform with the mini Countryman. L ike the previous generation 1 Series, it has the option of AWD. Unlike the previous-gen 1 Series, its a front-biased AWD system. Despite the torque-vectoring, t his car is unlikely to handle like a BMW should.

BMW claims that 80% of 1 Series buyers don’t know or care which wheels are driven. But by going FWD, they’re sticking the middle finger up to the 20% that do care.

Engines? Turbocharged 3 cylinder and 4 cylinder engines. Some diesel. What does the M135i have? Just a twin-turbo 4 cylinder engine with 302hp . Its no doubt an impressive engine. But its unlikely to be as enjoyable as a straight 6. xDrive versions are auto-only, but the FWD versions are available with a manual.

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Styling-wise, the 1 Series was never the best looking car. But it had its unique shape, and was distinctly a BMW. This new 1 Series is a shapeless blob with the snout of a pig. Or the nose of a cocaine addict.

Inside, its very similar to the latest 3 Series. Very similar interior design, and like the new 3 Series, it has the option of digital gauges, and gimmicks such as the voice control system where you say “Hey BMW- I’m hot” for the car to turn on the A/ C. What’ s wrong with just pressing the button? At least the interior looks high quality. That is assuming you have the digital gauges- the standard gauges look like something from an early 2000s Kia.

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With the 1 Series going FWD, the 3 Series ditching the manual transmission (except the diesel engines), and the 5 Series ditching the manual altogether, The Ultimate Driving Machine as a marketing slogan seems ironic. Recently, BMW have been making terrible d ecisions. Historically, if you wanted comfort, you bought a Mercedes, if you wanted a drivers car, you bought a BMW, and if you didn’t know much about cars, you bought an Audi. Right now, BMW is irrelevant-they don’t offer anything.

It is rumoured that the BMW CEO may be getting fired. Coincidence? I think not. Hopefully BMW will get themselves back on track. Hopefully the next 2 Series will be The Ultima te Driving Machine.


DISCUSSION (5)


Kinja'd!!! pip bip - choose Corrour > Jordan
05/27/2019 at 08:46

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cocaine addict over time loses the bit between the nostrils or collapse entirely

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Kinja'd!!! LongbowMkII > Jordan
05/27/2019 at 09:00

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Eh, bmws haven’t been for “drivers” in decades 


Kinja'd!!! Jordan > LongbowMkII
05/27/2019 at 09:25

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Disagree, there have been lots of great drivers BMW’s in the last 15 years. Any six-cylinder 1 Series is a joy to drive, especially with a manual, the current 2 Series is great, and while the F30 3 Series was softer and more comfort focussed than previous 3 Series models, it was still a great fun car to drive. Unless it was a hybrid. 


Kinja'd!!! nermal > Jordan
05/27/2019 at 09:49

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So it’s basically a lowered X1.

If you want a modern interpretation of the “traditional BMW”, there’ s the M2 or 240i, both of which are fantastic. The problem isn’t that those “driver’s cars” aren’t available , it’s that they aren’t being bought.


Kinja'd!!! sony1492 > Jordan
05/27/2019 at 09:51

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This is watching a plane crash